Tuesday, December 6, 2011

The Spits Are Haunted

The Spits, Haunted Fang Castle, is quite possibly the worst record that has ever come across my desk in the ten years I've been writing reviews. And having listened to this and wept openly over it, I'm not 100% sure that it's the joke it's supposed to be. You see, Haunted Fang Castle, is supposed to play out like a story/record book where you follow along and turn the page when it pings. In between pings though, The Spits, blast out some heavy dirge that sounds like the worst metal record slowed down to half speed. It's hilarious stuff that comes off like the long lost classic from M.O.D., Surfin M.O.D., except that it's quite possibly worse.

The Spits are absolutely horrible at playing and the production of the story part of this disc is so poorly done you can't help but laugh at it. This thing is so bad that, I'm half convinced this was all dreamed up, recorded, and put together in someone’s garage in about thirty minutes one Saturday afternoon as a joke. You can't buy comedy like this and that might be why this disc is being given away. I won't recommend this...but if you happen to see a copy pick it up and prepare to shriek, scream, and run away from this record. Fang Castle might not be haunted but your head will be by The Spits and their inability to play music...joke or not.

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